How to Ask for a LinkedIn Recommendation (Scripts + Timing That Works)
The psychology behind getting a yes, who to ask first, what to give them, and copy-paste scripts that make it easy for both of you.

Shanjai Raj
Founder at Postking

Common hesitation from r/LinkedInLunatics
"I've been at my company for 2 years and have zero recommendations. I know I should ask for them, but every time I think about it, I freeze. It feels so awkward and self-promotional. Is there a way to ask that doesn't make me want to disappear?"
Asking for recommendations feels uncomfortable because you're essentially asking someone to publicly vouch for you. That's a real ask. But here's what most people miss: a well-crafted recommendation request actually makes the other person's job easier, not harder.
The problem isn't that people don't want to write recommendations. It's that most requests put all the mental burden on the recommender. "Can you write me a recommendation?" is the professional equivalent of "What do you want for dinner?" - technically simple, but paralyzingly open-ended.
In this guide, you'll get:
- ✅ The psychology of why people say yes (and when they definitely won't)
- ✅ Who to ask and in what order (prioritized by impact)
- ✅ When to ask and when to absolutely avoid it
- ✅ Copy-paste scripts for different relationships
- ✅ The "make it easy" framework that gets faster responses
- ✅ How to handle reciprocity without it feeling transactional
Table of Contents
- Why Recommendations Actually Matter
- The Psychology of Getting a Yes
- Who to Ask (Priority Order)
- When to Ask (And When NOT To)
- The "Make It Easy" Framework
- Scripts for Every Relationship Type
- What to Include in Your Request
- Good vs Awkward Asks (Examples)
- The Reciprocity Play
- After They Say Yes
- FAQ
Why Recommendations Actually Matter
Before we get into the how, let's address the "why bother" question.
LinkedIn recommendations serve three distinct purposes:
1. Social proof for recruiters and hiring managers
Recruiters skim profiles in 7-10 seconds. A profile with 5+ recommendations from credible sources signals "this person is vetted." It's the difference between a restaurant with no reviews and one with 200 five-star ratings. Same food, different trust level.
2. Keyword reinforcement for LinkedIn search
Recommendations are indexed by LinkedIn's search algorithm. When your former manager writes "Sarah is an exceptional project manager who consistently delivered complex initiatives on time," you're getting organic keyword density for "project manager," "delivered," and "initiatives." This matters for inbound opportunities.
3. Specificity that your profile can't provide
Your About section says what you do. Recommendations prove you actually did it well. Third-party validation hits differently than self-promotion.
What the data shows:
- Profiles with 5+ recommendations receive 17% more profile views (LinkedIn internal data, 2023)
- Candidates with recommendations from managers are 3x more likely to get interview callbacks (Jobvite Recruiter Nation Survey)
- 85% of recruiters say recommendations influence their shortlisting decisions
The return on investment for a 15-minute recommendation request is absurdly high. So why don't more people do it?
The Psychology of Getting a Yes
Understanding why people agree to write recommendations helps you craft requests that work.
The 3 Triggers That Drive Agreement
Trigger 1: Genuine positive experience
This is obvious but underrated. People want to write recommendations for people they actually enjoyed working with. If you were reliable, helpful, or made their job easier, they want to say nice things about you. You're giving them permission to do something they'd naturally want to do.
Trigger 2: Low effort required
The biggest barrier isn't willingness - it's time. Most professionals are drowning in their own work. A recommendation request that requires them to recall specific details from 18 months ago, figure out what to write, and carve out 30 minutes to craft something good... that's a big ask.
Trigger 3: Reciprocity
This works in two ways. If you've already done something for them (helped on a project, referred them business, written them a recommendation), they feel a natural pull to reciprocate. Alternatively, if you offer to write one for them first, you're creating a low-pressure reciprocity loop.
The 3 Barriers That Kill Requests
Barrier 1: Asking at the wrong time
Right after someone delivered bad news, during their busiest season, or when your working relationship is strained. Timing matters more than most people realize.
Barrier 2: Being too vague
"Can you write me a recommendation?" forces them to do all the work. What should they focus on? How long should it be? What's the context? Vague requests get ignored not out of malice, but overwhelm.
Barrier 3: Asking too formally or too casually
A formal email to someone you chat with daily feels weird. A casual Slack message to a former executive feels inappropriate. Match your tone to the relationship.
Who to Ask (Priority Order)
Not all recommendations carry equal weight. Here's who to prioritize, ranked by impact:
Tier 1: Highest Impact (Start Here)
| Who | Why It Matters | What They Should Speak To |
|---|---|---|
| Direct managers | Hiring managers trust other managers' assessments | Your work quality, reliability, growth trajectory |
| Senior leaders who observed your work | Authority carries weight | Strategic thinking, cross-functional impact |
| Clients you delivered for | External validation > internal validation | Results, responsiveness, expertise |
Tier 2: Strong Impact
| Who | Why It Matters | What They Should Speak To |
|---|---|---|
| Peers you collaborated closely with | Demonstrates you're good to work with | Collaboration, problem-solving, communication |
| Direct reports (if applicable) | Shows leadership and development skills | Management style, mentorship, support |
| Partners or vendors | Shows external relationships | Professionalism, negotiation, partnership |
Tier 3: Supporting Evidence
| Who | Why It Matters | What They Should Speak To |
|---|---|---|
| Professors or mentors | Especially valuable for early-career | Potential, learning ability, character |
| Volunteer or board colleagues | Shows broader engagement | Community involvement, leadership |
| Classmates from programs | MBA/bootcamp/cohort contexts | Peer perception, teamwork |
The Golden Ratio
For most profiles, aim for this mix:
- 2-3 from managers or senior leaders (establishes you're trusted by decision-makers)
- 2-3 from peers or collaborators (proves you're good to work with)
- 1-2 from clients or external stakeholders (validates you deliver)
Don't:
- Have only manager recommendations (looks like you can't connect with peers)
- Have only peer recommendations (lacks authority)
- Have recommendations only from one company (shows limited network)
When to Ask (And When NOT To)
Timing is everything. A perfectly worded request sent at the wrong time will get ignored or declined.
Best Times to Ask
Within 2 weeks of project completion
The details are fresh. They can speak specifically about what you did, how you handled challenges, and what results you achieved. Waiting 6 months means they'll write something generic because they can't remember the specifics.
After receiving positive feedback
Someone just told you "great job on that presentation" or "really appreciated how you handled that client"? That's your cue. Follow up within 48 hours while the sentiment is fresh.
During natural career transitions
When you announce a new role, promotion, or company change, people expect LinkedIn activity. Asking for a recommendation during this window feels natural, not random.
Right after you've helped them
You just referred them a great candidate, helped them on a project, or made an intro that turned into business. Reciprocity is highest immediately after you've provided value.
Worst Times to Ask
During layoffs or reorgs
Your manager just found out their team is being cut in half. Not the time. They're dealing with their own survival. Wait until things stabilize.
When they're clearly overwhelmed
If they've mentioned being slammed, working weekends, or dealing with a crisis, don't add to their plate. Note it and circle back in 3-4 weeks.
Right after conflict or tension
You disagreed on a major decision, they gave you critical feedback, or there's unresolved friction. Let things cool off and rebuild rapport first.
Monday mornings or Friday afternoons
Monday mornings: inbox overload. Friday afternoons: already checked out mentally. Aim for Tuesday-Thursday, mid-morning.
During their vacation or holiday periods
Obvious, but worth stating. Check their out-of-office status.
The "Wait 3 Months" Myth
Some advice says to wait 3 months before asking for recommendations from a new manager or colleague. This is outdated. If you've shipped meaningful work together and the relationship is solid, you can ask earlier. The key is having something specific for them to reference, not hitting an arbitrary time threshold.
The "Make It Easy" Framework
The single biggest factor in getting recommendations written quickly is how much effort you remove from the process. Here's the framework:
Step 1: Give Context
Tell them why you're asking. This isn't manipulative - it's helpful.
- "I'm actively job searching and beefing up my profile"
- "I'm trying to position myself for leadership roles"
- "I want to strengthen my professional presence before our company's funding announcement"
Context helps them tailor what they write.
Step 2: Suggest Specific Focus Areas
Don't ask for a generic recommendation. Point them to exactly what you'd like them to speak to:
Instead of: "Can you write about our time working together?"
Say: "Would you be willing to speak to [specific project/skill]? Specifically, I'd love if you could mention [concrete example]."
Examples:
- "The Q3 product launch we led together - how we handled the timeline crunch"
- "My ability to translate technical concepts for non-technical stakeholders"
- "How I grew from individual contributor to managing a small team"
Step 3: Provide Talking Points
This is where most people fail. You're not writing their recommendation for them - you're giving them raw material.
Include:
- 2-3 bullet points of what you worked on together
- Specific outcomes or metrics if available
- One or two qualities you demonstrated
Example talking points you might send:
"A few things that might be helpful to reference:
- The integration project we led in Q2 (3 systems, 6-week timeline, came in on time)
- How I managed stakeholder communication when scope changed mid-project
- The process improvements I documented that the team still uses"
Step 4: Give Them an Out
Always make declining easy. This reduces pressure and paradoxically increases yes rates:
- "Totally understand if you're slammed right now - no pressure at all"
- "If this doesn't feel like the right fit, completely get it"
- "Feel free to say no if timing doesn't work"
Step 5: Set a Soft Timeline
Without a deadline, your request sits in their "I'll get to it" pile forever.
Don't say: "Whenever you have time"
Do say: "If you're able to, sometime in the next couple weeks would be amazing"
Scripts for Every Relationship Type
Here are copy-paste templates, organized by relationship. Customize the bracketed sections.
For a Current Manager
Subject line (if email): Quick favor - LinkedIn recommendation
Message:
Hey [Name],
I'm working on strengthening my LinkedIn profile and wondered if you'd be open to writing a short recommendation.
I know you're busy, so I wanted to make it easy. Here's some context:
- [Specific project you worked on together]
- [Outcome or result]
- [Quality you demonstrated]
If you'd be willing to speak to any of that, it would mean a lot. Totally understand if timing doesn't work - no pressure at all.
Would be happy to write one for you too if it would be helpful.
For a Former Manager
Subject line: Would love a recommendation if you have 10 min
Message:
Hi [Name],
Hope you're doing well at [their company]! I've been meaning to reach out.
I'm updating my LinkedIn profile and immediately thought of our time working together on [specific project or period]. Would you be open to writing a brief recommendation?
A few things that might be helpful to mention:
- [Project or achievement]
- [Skill or quality]
- [Impact or outcome]
Completely understand if you're swamped - just thought I'd ask. I really valued working with you and learned a lot during that time.
Hope all is well with [something specific about them - new role, company, etc].
For a Peer/Colleague
Subject line: Quick favor?
Message:
Hey [Name],
Would you be up for swapping LinkedIn recommendations? I'm beefing up my profile and figured our work on [project] would be worth highlighting.
If you're in, I'd focus on [what you'd write about for them] - let me know if that sounds good and I'll draft something up.
For your end, totally up to you, but our [specific collaboration] would be great to reference. No pressure on length - even a few sentences would be awesome.
Let me know!
For a Client
Subject line: Quick ask - would mean a lot
Message:
Hi [Name],
It's been great working with you and the [their company] team on [project/engagement].
I'm updating my LinkedIn profile and wondered if you'd be open to writing a brief recommendation about our work together. I know you're busy, so even 2-3 sentences would be incredibly valuable.
If helpful, some things you could reference:
- [Specific result or outcome you delivered]
- [How you approached the work]
- [Any positive feedback they've previously given you]
Totally understand if timing doesn't allow - really appreciate you either way.
For a Mentor or Professor
Subject line: Quick favor - LinkedIn recommendation
Message:
Hi [Name],
I hope this message finds you well. I'm reaching out because I'm in the process of building my professional presence on LinkedIn, and I immediately thought of you.
Your mentorship during [specific time period or context] was incredibly formative for me. I wondered if you'd be willing to write a brief recommendation speaking to [specific skill or quality].
I know you get many requests, so I completely understand if you're not able to. If you are, I'd be happy to provide some talking points or context that might be helpful.
Thank you for everything you taught me during [time period].
For Someone You Haven't Talked to in a While
Subject line: Been meaning to reach out + small favor
Message:
Hi [Name],
I've been meaning to reconnect - it's been too long since [company/project/context]!
I'm updating my LinkedIn profile and our work on [specific project] came to mind. Would you be open to writing a quick recommendation? I know it's been a while, so I'm happy to jog your memory with some specifics if that's helpful.
No worries if timing doesn't work - it was genuinely great working with you and I hope you're doing well at [their current company/situation].
Would love to catch up properly sometime too.
What to Include in Your Request
When you ask for a recommendation, make sure you provide:
Essential Information
| What to Include | Example |
|---|---|
| Specific projects you worked on | "The Q3 product launch," "The client onboarding redesign" |
| Your role in the work | "I led the technical implementation," "I coordinated the cross-functional team" |
| Outcomes or metrics | "Reduced processing time by 40%," "Launched on schedule despite scope changes" |
| Skills you demonstrated | "Problem-solving under pressure," "Stakeholder management" |
| Context for why you're asking | "I'm job searching," "Building my leadership brand" |
Helpful Additions
- Suggested length: "Even a few sentences would be great" or "I know you're busy - short is totally fine"
- Timeline: "Sometime in the next couple weeks would be amazing"
- Offer to help: "I can send some bullet points if that makes it easier"
- Easy out: "Completely understand if timing doesn't work"
What NOT to Include
- A draft you wrote for them (that's ghostwriting and feels weird)
- Pressure language ("I really need this by Friday")
- Generic asks ("Can you say something nice about me?")
- Too many options ("Could you mention my leadership OR my technical skills OR my communication...")
Good vs Awkward Asks (Examples)
Let's look at real examples of what works and what doesn't.
Example 1: Too Generic
Awkward:
"Hey, would you be willing to write me a LinkedIn recommendation? We worked together at Acme Corp and I think it would help my profile. Let me know!"
Why it fails: Zero specificity. They have to do all the mental work - recall what you worked on, decide what to focus on, figure out what matters for your goals.
Better:
"Hey, would you be up for writing a recommendation about our work on the ERP migration last year? Specifically, if you could mention how we handled the vendor negotiations and timeline crunch, that would be awesome. I'm trying to position myself for more senior PM roles. Happy to send a few bullet points if helpful - and no worries if you're swamped!"
Example 2: Too Long and Overwhelming
Awkward:
"Hi Sarah, I hope you're doing well. I'm reaching out because I've been thinking a lot about my career trajectory and personal brand development strategy. As you know, LinkedIn has become an incredibly important platform for professional visibility, and I've been conducting research on how to optimize my profile for maximum impact. One key element that emerged from my analysis is the value of authentic recommendations from colleagues who have direct experience with my work. Given our extensive collaboration over the past three years across multiple initiatives including the customer success program redesign, the onboarding automation project, the quarterly business reviews restructuring, and the cross-functional customer feedback loops implementation, I believe you would be an ideal candidate to speak to my capabilities and contributions. I would be deeply grateful if you would consider allocating some time to craft a thoughtful recommendation that highlights my strategic thinking, operational excellence, and collaborative approach..."
Why it fails: Information overload. They stopped reading after the second sentence. This feels like homework, not a request.
Better:
"Hi Sarah, would you be up for a quick LinkedIn recommendation? I'd love it if you could speak to our work on the customer success program - specifically how we handled the redesign under tight timelines. Even a few sentences would mean a lot. Let me know if some talking points would be helpful!"
Example 3: Too Casual for the Relationship
Awkward (to a senior executive you worked with occasionally):
"yo! can u write me a linkedin rec? would be sick. lmk!"
Why it fails: Tone mismatch. This might work for a close peer but not for a senior leader. It suggests you don't respect their time.
Better:
"Hi [Name], I hope things are going well. I'm updating my LinkedIn profile and wondered if you'd have a few minutes to write a brief recommendation. I valued your feedback during the [specific project] and think your perspective would carry real weight. Completely understand if you're too busy - just wanted to ask. Thank you either way."
Example 4: No Easy Out
Awkward:
"I'd really appreciate a recommendation from you. It would mean a lot and help me with my job search. When can you have it done by?"
Why it fails: Pressuring and transactional. They feel trapped, which makes them want to avoid responding entirely.
Better:
"Would you be open to writing a quick recommendation? Totally understand if timing doesn't work or if it doesn't feel like the right fit - no pressure at all. If you are able to, sometime in the next couple weeks would be amazing."
The Reciprocity Play
One of the most effective strategies is offering to write a recommendation first. This works for three reasons:
- It removes the ask imbalance - You're not just taking, you're giving
- It creates natural reciprocity - Most people feel compelled to return favors
- It gives you control of timing - You can send yours first, then gently prompt
How to Execute This
Step 1: Write them a genuine recommendation first. Don't ask for anything in return yet.
Step 2: Send them a heads up:
"Hey [Name], just wrote you a LinkedIn recommendation - wanted to highlight the great work you did on [project]. Should show up in your notifications. No need to reciprocate unless you want to - just wanted to recognize your contributions!"
Step 3: Wait 1-2 weeks. If they don't reciprocate naturally:
"Hey, glad you liked the recommendation! If you ever have a few minutes and felt inclined to write one back, I'd really appreciate it. Totally optional though - no pressure!"
When NOT to Use This Approach
- When the power dynamic is too lopsided (they're a C-level exec and you're entry-level)
- When you don't have anything genuine to say about their work
- When it would feel obviously transactional given your relationship
After They Say Yes
Your job isn't done when they agree. Here's how to ensure it actually gets written:
Send a Follow-Up with Talking Points
Within 24 hours of them saying yes, send:
"Thank you so much! Here's some context that might help:
- [Project or context]
- [Specific contribution you made]
- [Outcome or impact]
Feel free to use any of this or ignore it completely - just wanted to make it as easy as possible. No rush, but if you get a chance in the next couple weeks, that would be great!"
Gentle Reminder if It's Been 2 Weeks
Life gets busy. A gentle nudge is fine:
"Hey [Name], just floating this back up in case it got buried! Totally understand if you're swamped - let me know if a quick call would be easier than writing."
Thank Them When It's Done
This sounds obvious but most people skip it:
"Just saw your recommendation come through - thank you so much! Really means a lot. [Specific thing you appreciated about what they wrote]. I owe you one!"
Reciprocate if Appropriate
If they don't already have many recommendations from you, write one back. Even if they didn't ask.
FAQ
How many recommendations should I have on my profile?
Aim for 5-10 quality recommendations. More than 15 starts to look curated or desperate. Quality and diversity (different companies, roles, relationship types) matter more than raw quantity.
What if they write something generic or not very good?
Accept it graciously. You can't reject or edit their recommendation without them knowing. If it's truly weak, you can choose not to display it on your profile (recommendations can be hidden). But don't ask them to rewrite it - that's awkward for everyone.
Should I ask people to include specific keywords?
Yes, subtly. When you provide talking points, include the keywords naturally:
Instead of: "Please include the word 'project management'"
Say: "Would be great if you could speak to the project management work we did on the Q3 initiative"
How do I ask someone I didn't have the best relationship with?
Don't. Recommendations should be genuine. If the relationship was strained or the work was mediocre, asking puts them in an uncomfortable position. Focus on people who will genuinely advocate for you.
What if I'm senior and asking someone junior?
This is totally fine and actually signals humility. Frame it around their unique perspective:
"I know it might be unusual, but I'd really value your perspective since you saw the day-to-day of how I work with the team. Would you be open to writing a recommendation about my management style?"
How often should I ask for recommendations?
Major career milestones: new job, completed major project, promotion, leaving a company. Don't ask the same person more than once every 2-3 years unless the context is very different.
Can I ask via LinkedIn message or should I email?
Match the communication channel you normally use with that person. LinkedIn message is fine for connections you don't have email for. Email feels more thoughtful for closer relationships or senior contacts.
Quick Action Steps
This week:
- Identify 3 people from your Tier 1 list (managers, senior leaders, clients)
- Pick the one where timing is best right now
- Send your request using the appropriate script above
This month:
- Request 3-5 recommendations across different relationship types
- Write 2 recommendations for others (without being asked)
- Follow up on any outstanding requests after 2 weeks
Going forward:
- Request recommendations within 2 weeks of completing major projects
- Write unsolicited recommendations for great colleagues (builds goodwill)
- Review your recommendation mix annually and fill gaps
Related Resources
Need help with other aspects of your LinkedIn presence?
- LinkedIn Post Ideas Generator - Get content ideas tailored to your industry
- LinkedIn Hook Generator - Create opening lines that stop the scroll
- LinkedIn Post Formatter - Format your posts for maximum readability
LinkedIn recommendations are one of the highest-ROI activities for your professional brand. The ask feels uncomfortable, but a well-structured request makes it easy for people who already want to support you. Start with one request this week. The momentum builds from there.

Written by
Shanjai Raj
Founder at Postking
Building tools to help professionals grow on LinkedIn. Passionate about content strategy and personal branding.
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